Dear Men of LA:
I heard this gem on Saturday night:
“Hello beautiful! I want to go out with you. I respect you so much.
“Sorry. I’m going out with someone.”
“How can that be? I respect you so much!”
“I have so much respect for you. My grandma taught me respect. She used to let me watch her masturbate and got me a prostitute when I was thirteen. She taught me so much respect!”
“What the hell?”
Let this be a lesson to all of you guys out there. Telling a girl you used to watch your grandma masturbate is not the way to a girl’s heart!!…..Or her vagina!