Dear Men of LA:
Before you offer to give a girl a back rub please know at least halfway what you are doing. Now we all know “I’ll give you a back rub is code for “If I give you a back rub you’ll give me a blowjob or have sex with me. Quid Pro Quo” Now in the girl’s mind she’s cringing because she’s about to get some kind of back torture that rivals pain from the seventh circle of hell. So before you start kneading and punching the poor girl’s back and sending her into a pain so intense that she’ll probably have to go the ER later, take a breath. Watch a video. Surely there must be some kind of how to videos on back rubbing, sex, oral, and other things you might need to know for that special night with your lady. After all knowledge is power.