Valentine’s Day Is The Perfect Day To Get Laid

Dear Men of LA:

It’s Valentine’s Day this weekend.  You think, “Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to get laid!  All I have to do is go buy some her flowers and she’ll be putty in my hands in a few hours!”  Not so fast slick!  Where do you think you are going to find a girl that will go out with you last minute on Valentines Day, the day all girls love the most?  Well here are some suggestions:

1.  Craigslist    Craigslist is filled with crazy women who are looking to get laid.  Just tell them you are an air plane pilot, independently wealthy, or some other bullshit, send a picture that was from 5 years ago when you were 10 pounds lighter, and you are all set.  Instant sex.  Just don’t be surprised when you wake up the next morning with all of your money gone and your dick chopped off.

2.  Tinder  Swipe right and find out.

3.  Whisper  All you have to to do is put a sexy  naughty message out there like “Happy Valentines Day sexy!  Come over and I can show you my Valentine if you show me yours!!!” or  “I have a big Valentine just waiting for you.”   Trust me!  You will have women crawling all over you in no time!

4.  Happn   Use this app and you will find your valentine’s date right next to you.  Of course she’ll probably be a stalker and you’ll never get rid of her.

5.  The Grocery Store.   This is an oldie but a goodie but I swear it still works.  Go to the booze aisle or the chocolate aisle.  There’s always single desperate women in each of those.

2 thoughts on “Valentine’s Day Is The Perfect Day To Get Laid

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s