Never Send A Dick Picture To A Girl! It Never Works!

Dear Men of LA:

Let’s talk about a subject that I’m sure is near and dear to your heart.  Your penis.  More to the point, sending pictures of your penis to girls who you are trying to hook up with.  IT’S A BAD IDEA!!!!  You should see the collection of penis pictures I have on my computer that I’ve gotten over the years.  I have enough pictures of dicks to paper all of downtown Los Angeles with.  Ten times over!!!!  So here is a piece of advice to men all over.  Don’t do it.  Do you really think we want to see a picture of your dick?  Hell no.  Why would you think we do, especially since we don’t even know you?  Is your dick magical?  Does it have special properties?  Can it grant wishes?  Does it make ice cream or chocolate?  Because you know that’s what us women really want ice cream, chocolate and for all of our wishes to come true.  I wonder what the success rate of dick pictures are?  Probably less than five percent I’d say.  So here is a piece of advice for you men out there.  The next time you think, “hey I’ll send this girl a picture of my dick and I know it’s going to make her rush right over and have sex with me” don’t.  IT NEVER WORKS!  Instead ask her about her.  Get to know her.  And take her out for ice cream!!  Ice cream gets you laid every time over dick pictures!!!

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