Protect Your Woman

Dear Men of LA:

If you are walking home from a date and a maniac jumps in front of you don’t run away.  Especially if the guy starts spitting on her.  Be a man, don’t be a pussy.  A pussy never gets any pussy.

Fuck Me Because The Bumper Sticker Says So

Dear Men of LA:

Do not use a bumper sticker to get laid.  Never walk up to a girl and hold up a bumper sticker that says, “Fuck Me” and say, “Fuck me, see the bumper sticker says so!”  Try harder.  You can come up with something better than that.

Do You Have An American Domestic Animal?

Dear Men of LA:

Do not say the following on a first date:  Show some damn common sense:

1.  Do you have an american domestic animal living in your house?  (Come on, can’t you just say pet?)

2.  I have a dog because I’m an emotionally needy person.  (Really?)

3.  Do you have breathable air in your back yard?  (I guess so, I’m not dead yet)

4.  Did you know that african american men are very virile and love hip hop music.   (Huh?)

 

Every thing from the above was said to me on a date a couple of weeks ago.  Finally after the last one I had to say, what is wrong with you.  Seriously!!!